I'm not wrong to feel like this, right?

I feel conflicted, betrayed, stressed and beyond.
I just put so much effort into my club that I'm president of, and a show I'm barely seen in. And all I see are people taking things for granted and being stupid when people would kill just to have a line or dance number..
I worked more than 6 hours doing things the other day that weren't even my job.. I was disappointed and I came home in tears.

Not to mention, It's eating me alive knowing that if I could have lost like, 40 more pounds by now.. maybe I would have had a better part in the show. As disgusting as that sounds, it's true. I'm type casted or not casted at all and if I had lost a little more...

Not only am I trying my best to focus on myself, but now I need to focus on things that I won't be acknowledged for, but that are also not my job.
It's incredibly frustrating and exhausting.
And I got too hyped up in something/someone that would never be. I figured because I gained confidence I suddenly gained a backbone. That slowly died when I realized that I haven't changed anything. I took a chance, and it failed. So, needless to say, I'm incredibly frustrated.

I'm going to the gym. Lord knows I need it.. :/
Things will get better I'm sure..

-Alexa Starky

P.S. to my followers who also have my on facebook. I made a like page. Like that and it will have most of my updates. Thanks!

https://www.facebook.com/pages/My-Mission-To-Change/103855846370032