This whole prom thing is really starting to swallow me whole.
I keep thinking about it.
Everyone has a date. Then there is me, sitting here.
And yet again, I turn to my weight. I keep beating myself up saying 'You could have lost more.' or 'No one wants to ask because you haven't lost enough.'
It's all about the weight.
I'm a happy person and I like the way I look now, but this whole prom thing is going to be the death of me.
I promised myself it wouldn't. But everyone is getting these pretty dresses and getting asked in these awesome ways. I'm even helping people ask other people. I'm like.. I'm like the girl from 27 dresses. Helping everyone else, and not helping herself or getting what I feel I deserve and really want.
People say to go alone. It will be better with friends. Seriously, shut up! You'd hate it to if you were the only one going alone.
And people say ask someone yourself! My biggest fear is rejection. And I am still 'the fat girl' only now I believe I'm 'the fat girl who's trying to lose weight' at my school. I can't just walk around and ask because in my eyes I'm still that insecure girl who will get rejected in a heartbeat. So.
This is just stressful and I want this whole thing to be over!
-Alexa Starky
i promise you, you're not the only one hun. and prom is a night to feel beautiful and who cares what others think? you don't need other people to say you're pretty just so you feel pretty. it's all on the inside, you're doing this for yourself right? and if you say prom will suck, it will but it definitely WILL be the most amazing night if you tell yourself it will. keep your chin up because the Alexa I know, is extremely strong and has gotten too far to let one night ruin it all. I, myself, don't have a date, nor do I feel comfortable in my own skin. I've helped everyone else find THAT dress but I don't even have one yet. And now my attitude towards prom has changed then what it was in January. I'm going to go for myself. I'm going to go and prove to people that no matter how I look, I am confident and I am beautiful. I'm going to get a dress that I love, no matter how expensive. And Alexa, you should too. You are beautiful. You are an inspiration to other girls who want to lose weight or ever don't feel beautiful. I know you can do this, and I know deep down inside, somewhere beneath all the stress and fears, that you feel beautiful. And that you are waiting to shine. Well babe, this is your night. With, or without, a guy. You're life is a whole wardrobe, and guys are just a small accessory.
ReplyDeleteOMG I just LOVE the comment above!!! Whoever the girl is who wrote it...I love you!!!
ReplyDeleteAlexa's Mom :-)